5. Captain Pearson Returns To Pudsey (Bus Story)

Captain Pearson’s ship got stuck when he sailed into Leeds up the canal. When he swore at people on the bank, a big fat lady shoved a bar of soap into his mouth. He spat it out, and when he was cross, he let all the gorillas out of the ship. People ran away.

Captain Cracker walked up with his parrot. Captain Pearson suggested they all get a bus up to Pudsey. The bus driver said it would be 60p each, including the hairy friends, and 30p for the parrot. Captain Pearson refused to pay.

The gorillas, cross about not getting a ride, picked up the driver and one of them climbed up the side of a big house and sat him on top of the chimney. The gorilla then got in the driving seat and set the bus going at top speed on the wrong side of the road. Cars and other buses crashed.

Ten police cars chased the bus with sirens blaring. The bus whizzed into the Market place, where everyone jumped off. They all dashed into Woolworths. The parrot shouted to the shop assistant for “Twenty Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles”. The assistant said they had no turtles. The parrot flew around, singing that Woolworths had no turtles. The boss was cross. The parrot flew over him and pooed on his head.

When the boss threatened to call the police, they all ran for the door. Captain Pearson ran into the swinging door, smashing his false teeth. The parrot laughed, and Captain Pearson was furious. Robert and Richard suggested he make dummy teeth from orange peel.

Captain Pearson got an orange and made some teeth. He got fish and chips from the Manor Fish shop, but when he took a huge bite, his orange peel teeth just bent. Captain Cracker ate the fish and chips.

The gorillas went to the playground to avoid listening to Captain Pearson. The parrot kept mocking him. Captain Pearson said he was going back to his ship to get his teeth fixed. A Police car drove up and told him he had to pay £100 for the door he ran into at Woolworths. The parrot kept laughing at him. Captain Pearson was so mad he went back to his ship.